![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
sgasesa-admin.livejournal.com posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
sga_santaTitle: And The Plural For Penis Is?
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
ru_salki99
Recipient:icarusancalion
Beta:raging_pancake
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: John/Rodney
Disclaimer: SGA belongs to MGM
Warnings: Genderswitch, transgender issues
Summary: John falls victim to an Ancient population control device and becomes, well, female.
( And The Plural For Penis Is? Part 1 of 2 )
---
Five weeks. Five weeks had passed and he was still very much female. So female in fact, he'd even had a period... and if that hadn't been the most anti-climatic experience of his life, he wasn't sure what was.
Two weeks ago, he'd gone to Keller for one of his regular check ups and had told her about how he was feeling more lethargic lately, that he had a weird achy feeling like maybe trapped wind or something and could she prescribe him something. She gave him pain killers, iron supplements, a hot water bottle and a bag of sanitary products... much to his confusion.
"Sounds like your cycle is starting," she told him. "You'll need to figure out if you prefer tampons or towels. Towels are good for night 'cause you don't need to get up and change them."
"Right," he'd said as he stared into the bag.
"You'll be fine," she said with a smile. "Use the hot water bottle. It'll help with the cramp. Hot baths help too. Oh and if you can get your hands on it, chocolate."
"Chocolate? That really works?"
"Hell yeah!" Keller said, her smile turning into a grin, as she started to dismiss him. "Let me know when you start, how heavy it is, how bad the cramping is and when it stops okay?"
"Um, sure," John said with a nod before hurrying out of the infirmary to stash his lady things in his underwear drawer.
He'd then gone in search of Rodney, for if there was one person who he knew had chocolate, it was him. He found him in the mess with Zelenka and Ronon. The three of them smiled and invited him to join them, but John waved them off, instead asking to speak with Rodney for a second.
"What is it? Is something wrong?"
"No, no. Nothing's wrong," John reassured him. "I just... I need chocolate and you're the only person I know who has some."
"You need chocolate?"
John nodded, "It's um..." he trailed off, feeling himself blushing.
And for all that he'd complained that Rodney had been doing that an awful lot with him to start with, ever since that day in the lab, John hadn't been able to stop himself from blushing in Rodney's presence. His body just liked to react to him in ways John couldn't prevent.
Thankfully however, Rodney seemed to understand almost straight away. John guessed having a sister had its benefits.
"Oh, you need it. Right, well I uh, I actually have to get down to the labs, but take out my sock drawer, it's all behind there."
"You don't mind me going into your room?" John asked him.
"Don't be ridiculous," Rodney said, resting a hand on his shoulder, "just go help yourself. Take as much as you need."
John nodded. "Okay," he said. "Thanks Rodney."
"Don't mention it," Rodney said with a shrug, "After all what else are knights in shining armour for if not to provide our damsels in distress with chocolate?"
"I own a gun," John reminded him, which for some reason only made Rodney smile as he made his way back to the others.
He'd found the chocolate no problem and had only taking a few pieces, not wanting to leave Rodney chocolateless, and he did not, under any circumstances, notice the condom box that resided in Rodney's sock drawer. Nuh uh.
He was aware that he had probably more than friendly feelings towards Rodney, the fact that his stomach did flip flops and he got wet whenever he was in the man's presence was a pretty big tell tale sign.
But he'd been attracted to him long before all of this had happened, so it wasn't anything to do with his gender, except maybe now Rodney would be interested in return... it was stupid, and wasn't really something to dwell on as he had far more important things to worry about than pretty eyed physicists and why they needed condoms.
Johnstone had more or less told him that at the moment, he had to concentrate on himself before anything else. His sessions with Johnstone had actually helped, but John wasn't about to admit that out loud to anyone; not wanting to ruin his reputation amongst his peers about being intolerant of shrinks. But he went every week, told Johnstone how he was adapting, how many times he'd cried that week, what he was feeling about himself in general.
The week of the period, Johnstone got a little excited. But John told him, he got some cramps and ate some chocolate that Rodney had given him. Johnstone had raised a curious eyebrow at that the mention of Rodney, but had refrained from commenting. He told him how when the bleeding started, he realised he preferred tampons to towels 'cause they didn't get in the way and then a few days later the bleeding stopped and that was that. No big deal.
Now, a week later--five weeks after the initial event--he was about to attend another senior staff meeting where Carson and Rodney had an announcement to make. He hadn't seen much of Rodney for the past few days and when he had seen him he'd been looking pretty exhausted so John had a small hope that perhaps they'd finally gotten some kind of breakthrough.
Morreti had already decided to start the gender therapy. John had had a meeting with him and O'Neill where they discussed Morreti's position within the military on Atlantis. He was to stay, carry on working during the initial hormone therapy and then, when he got his surgery, he would remain on Atlantis to heal before resuming his duties.
Hardy, had apparently been having gender issues for a long time but had previously been unable to get any kind of surgery because he or rather she was a haemophiliac and no surgeon on Earth would touch her before. So for the first time in her life, she was completely happy. And John was happy for her.
John meanwhile, couldn't actually decide what he wanted to do. He'd spent five weeks as a woman now and in all honestly, they weren't bad or painful and he'd actually got used to the move and feel of himself. He was training again both with Teyla and Ronon and no longer worried about getting checked out, in fact, he kind of enjoyed it sometimes.
Sure he missed the easiness of being male, the peeing standing up, being able to reach climax quickly - he'd not really explored that part of his body, but he'd certainly enjoyed it when he had... stickiness aside - and the not actually having to shower every day.
Sitting down in the board room, O'Neill - who was aiming to go back to Earth in a few days - gave him a short nod, while Rodney, who was in his usual place next to him, didn't even look at him. And that alone let John know that whatever was about to be said wasn't going to be good.
When everyone was finally seated, Carson, looking as tired as Rodney, stood up.
"So, we've finished our analysis of the lab," he said. "We found in the database an entry that explains the reasoning for one half of the couple having to activate the disk. The reasoning being that the gene in the individual going through the change would only respond to the gene of someone who they trusted and cared deeply about. Which, when the General reviewed the security feed for the lab, he confirmed for us. The three men who activated each of your disks are very close to you."
John looked at Rodney then, for he was the only gene carrier who had been in that room who he had been remotely close to or trusted, which meant that Rodney was probably on a very big guilt trip at the moment.
Morreti and Hardy were both frowning, obviously thinking of the others who had been in the room with them when they had changed.
"The process of the change is really quite a simple one. A beam comes out of the disk, encompassing the individual standing on it and the 'y' chromosome is removed, changing the man into a woman, their appearance exactly what it would be had they been born female instead of male."
"I don't get it," Morreti said.
John rolled his eyes. He knew Morreti wasn't stupid, he would have never become an officer if he was, it was probably just pure laziness that he didn't actually know anything about chromosomes or didn't want to.
"You understand the process of conception yes?" Carson asked him.
"Of course I do," Morreti said, looking annoyed.
"Well, each of us have two chromosomes in our genetic make up that determine our sex. Females, have two x chromosomes making them XX, while men have an x and a y, making us XY. The way in which our sex is determined depends on if the sperm fertalising the egg contains an x or a y chromosome as every egg is XX."
"Every egg is XX?" Morreti asked.
"Yes sergeant, that's what I said," Carson nodded. "We all start off as XX and this machine was made to revert anyone who was born XY back to their XX status."
"So we are completely, one hundred percent female?" Hardy asked.
"Yes." Carson nodded.
"Okay," O'Neill said, "so have you found a way to reverse it?"
Carson turned to Rodney. "Do you want to handle this one?"
Rodney sighed but nodded his head, "So, we examined all the data and came up with our own version that theoretically, should have been able to input the y chromosome. We even took apart one of the disks and attempted to reverse engineer it by applying our theory. However, all of our trials and simulations failed. We have no idea why."
"So what you're saying is?" John asked.
"I'm sorry John, but I can't fix this. None of us can. It's impossible."
John knew he should have felt upset at this, should've gotten angry and yelled at the injustice of it all. But looking at Rodney, seeing how utterly exhausted the man was and how devastated that he wasn't able to fix John, he just couldn't bring himself to get even a little bit annoyed.
"You tried," John said, reaching out to rub a hand along Rodney's arm in what he hoped was a soothing manner, "that's the important thing."
Rodney looked at him out of the corner of his eye, turning his arm round so that when John stroked downwards again, he was able to easily thread their fingers together. It should've felt weird, his now small hand wrapped up in Rodney's, but there was something about it that somehow made all of this, this entire nightmare, just seem better for a minute.
"Well, I guess we should then continue with your care plans as already agreed with doctors Keller, Beckett and Johnstone," Woolsey told them all. "Is there anything else?" he then asked Carson.
"No. You'll have a report of my findings on your desk in a day or two. But I'll be heading back to Earth with the General at the end of the week."
"Of course," Woolsey nodded, "in that case, you're all dismissed."
John rose with Rodney, intending to walk him back to his quarters and make the man get some sleep. However, just as they stepped out into the corridor, still holding hands, O'Neill called on John.
"Colonel, walk with me," he said, jerking his head to the right as he began to walk in the opposite direction.
John turned to Rodney, "Hey look, go get some sleep," he said, "I'll come see you when I'm done and we'll um, well."
Rodney nodded, "Yeah okay," he said, giving John's hand a soft squeeze before letting go and heading off towards the transporter.
John jogged to catch up with O'Neill who appeared to be heading towards the guest quarters where he was staying.
"Sir?" he asked once he was walking side by side with him.
"Let's do this in private," O'Neill said to him and so John didn't say anything else until the door had shut behind him and he was standing inside O'Neill's guest room.
He watched as O'Neill sat down on the bed and gestured for John to take the desk chair.
"So," he said once John was sitting down, "you and McKay?"
John felt his face go bright red. "Sir, I know what it looks like but I promise, nothing is going on and nothing has ever gone on. We're just friends and that's all we've been..."
"Sheppard, I couldn't care less," O'Neill told him. "But I have to ask because it looks to me that it won't be very long until you're a little more than friends and since you two have always been close... the SGC will want to know."
"I understand Sir," John nodded.
O'Neill stared at him for a second, studying before he spoke again, "I know that sexuality has nothing to do with gender," he begun, "but you're female now John, so if you were to end up in a relationship with a man, there would be no rules against it," he said. "You wouldn't have to hide it."
John nodded, "I'm aware of that," he said quietly.
O'Neill gave him a small nod, "Just so long as we're clear," he said.
"Crystal," John told him.
"Good. You can go now."
"Thank you Sir," John said as he stood.
"Oh one more thing colonel," O'Neill called, stopping John just before he walked through the door. "I'm leaving in three days. You'll need to let me know before then whether you require a new dress uniform or not."
Shit. John hadn't thought of that, "I'll get back to you Sir."
With one more nod from O'Neill, John all but fled the room, heading for his own quarters instead of Rodney's needing to be on his own for a while.
He ignored everyone else as he made his way there, in no mood to socialise with anyone. When he got to his room he sat down on the bed with a thump and stared down at his feet. They were smaller than they used to be, but in the military issue boots, looked more or less the same.
Standing up, he walked over to the bathroom, watching his feet the entire way. His strides were smaller yet still strong and still had the same, familiar swagger to them. When he got to the bathroom he turned to look in the mirror.
His BDU's didn't give away much about what was going on underneath them. Sure his thigh holster sat a little differently on him now that his hips were a little wider and thigh a different shape, but it wasn't overly obvious or anything.
But then he continued up and saw the way his breasts stretched his t-shirt. He had grown so used to having them, to seeing them in the mirror every morning that it felt a little weird to be examining himself like this. They were as much a part of him now as his eyes or hair.
And everything else that he knew he'd find if he took off his clothes. Those hips, the waist, the tiny hands and feet, the vagina. It was all his. All him.
He was a woman.
~*~*~*~*~*~
John let himself into Rodney's quarters, not at all surprised to find that Rodney was not in bed like he'd told him to be. His first thought was that Rodney had gone to the labs, no doubt wanting to go over the data again. But then, he heard the flush of the toilet coming from the bathroom and he realised Rodney was still there.
"Rodney?" he called.
The door opened, steam billowing out into the room, preceding Rodney's head, "I kind of smelled," he said as way of an explanation. "I haven't showered in days."
John smiled, knowing how Rodney got when he was concentrating on something, "You haven't shaved either," he pointed out, gesturing to Rodney's scruffy face.
"Yes well," Rodney adjusted the towel that was round his waist and stepped back inside the bathroom.
John followed him, leaning on the doorframe and watching as Rodney began to cover his face in shaving foam, the towel hanging low around his waist, his skin pink and glistening with the moisture still hanging in the air. John knew he was checking him out, but he really couldn't be blamed for that; Rodney's biceps... he hadn't actually noticed how large and toned they were. He had to have been working out with Ronon more than usual lately.
"You're smiling," Rodney said as he rinsed the excess foam from his hand, "why are you smiling?"
"I'm not going to change again," John told him as he stepped forward.
"You're not?"
John shook his head, "No. I mean, sure it was hard to start with but, I'm kind of used to being, well, me," he said with a shrug as he reached out and grabbed Rodney's razor.
Rodney gulped. "Really? You're happy?"
"Yeah," John nodded. "I mean, I get why Morreti isn't and why Hardy is, but for me, not much has changed in the grand scheme of things. I'm still me, I just look a little bit different."
"Well that's not strictly true," Rodney said as John sat himself up on the sink, "you're a lot prettier now than you used to be."
John smiled and grabbed Rodney's chin, tilting it up so he could start shaving him, "You trying to say I wasn't pretty McKay?"
"Not at all. I said you were prettier. You've always been somewhat pretty."
John didn't reply, just smiled to himself as he concentrated on not cutting Rodney. "Stop smiling."
"Sorry. Can't help it," Rodney told him, doing his best to school his face.
It should have felt weird, sitting here with Rodney standing between his legs as John shaved him. It was ridiculously intimate and of course, a certain heat was spreading down into his groin with the way Rodney had his hands placed on John's thighs.
"So what's the rule here?" Rodney asked as John rinsed off the razor. "What set of pronouns are we allowed to use?"
"What do you mean?" John asked curiously.
"Well, if I was to mention you to someone, should I say 'he' or 'she'?"
"Um... well I guess, feminine pronouns would be more appropriate," John said with a shrug.
"You don't think of yourself as a 'she'?"
"No. No, I do I guess. Yeah, yeah I'm a she," she said with a smile.
Rodney returned her smile before going quiet as John finished up, and soon the tension between them began to build even more. Both of them leaned into each other slightly and John was sure Rodney had a bit of a bump in the front of his towel that wasn't there ten minutes ago.
"So, what did O'Neill want?" Rodney asked quietly, his hands sliding up to rest at John's hips.
"He wanted to know if we were ever involved while I was a man," John told him, sliding her hands up Rodney's arms to rest on those biceps that she was all of a sudden rather obsessed with.
"Oh."
"Hmm," John said with a slight nod, "he also wanted to remind me, that now I'm a woman, I wouldn't have to hide it if I were to become involved with a man."
Rodney's hands tightened on her hips before they slowly began to work their way round John's back, up and under her t-shirt. It shouldn't have been such a turn on that Rodney's hand was able to cover the entire expanse of his back, but the feel of it just about turned John to putty.
"And is there a particular man you have in mind?" Rodney asked as he leaned down towards John.
"Possibly," John was just able to whisper before Rodney's lips connected with her own and she was pulled against a hard chest.
As kisses went, not only was it disgustingly hot, but it was new and different and felt so completely right that John didn't ever want it to stop. However, Rodney had other ideas and pulled back to lift John's t-shirt off, leaving John in the small black sports bra Keller had given her all those week's ago.
Rodney dropped John's t-shirt onto the floor before lifting his hand to gently caress one of John's breasts through the thick cotton and wow, Rodney's hand completely encompassed him, which for some reason turned John on even more and made his breath hitch.
"Can I..." Rodney began, reaching up to tug on one of the straps.
"Yeah," John nodded before sitting still and letting Rodney's oh so talented hands remove the confining item.
As soon as it was off, Rodney groaned softly before leaning back in to kiss John once more, his thumbs rubbing small circles on John's nipples and making John moan in a way she was sure was pretty indecent.
Then all of a sudden, Rodney clamped his hands onto John's thighs and lifted her up off the sink. John immediately wrapped her legs around Rodney's waist, holding on for dear life and marvelling at just how strong Rodney was - or maybe she was just a lot smaller than he thought he was - as he walked them through into the bedroom.
They landed on the bed with a slight 'oof', Rodney quickly apologising before they raced to get John's clothes off of her.
John lay back and let Rodney yank off her pants, leaving her in just her underwear - the small black 'boy shorts' that had arrived with the Daedalus last week - as Rodney stood at the bottom of the bed and just stared at her, his eyes completely filled with lust and something else that caused a warm flush to spread up John's cheeks. No one had ever looked at her like that before and it caused her breath to quicken and skin to tingle while she waited for Rodney to join her.
Rodney didn't waste much more time after that, hooking a thumb into the towel around his waist and pulling, causing it to fall to the floor, exposing his rock hard cock for John to see. As her eyes fell upon Rodney's considerable erection, she felt herself bite her lip, something she was aware that she did when she was nervous, and it seemed that Rodney was aware of this too. His expression quickly changed from one of insatiable hunger to one of affectionate concern. Slowly he began to crawl up John's body, laying soft, feather light kisses upon her skin as he went and John was helpless to the quiet moans that escaped her lips.
When Rodney's face was level with her own, he leaned down and placed a gentle kiss upon John's nose, cheeks and forehead before finally capturing her mouth in a deep, passionate kiss. When they pulled apart, John could hardly breath she was that aroused.
"We take this as far as you want," Rodney told her, his fingers gently carding their way through John's messy hair. "We don't have to do everything today."
"I know," was all John said before she reached up to kiss Rodney again, wrapping her legs around Rodney's waist and pulling him down onto her.
Rodney moaned into the kiss, his hand that was in John's hair coming down to cup her face, the other slowly travelling down her body to gently trail up and down her side, which was actually more of a turn on than she would ever have thought. Then Rodney began to rock his hips, his cock gently nudging against her clitoris, shooting pleasure through her body.
It was hot and so completely spine tingling that it didn't take long before John felt her body begin to shudder and her inner walls begin to tighten before she was suddenly throwing her head back and let out a deep moan as her first orgasm in her new body swept through her.
It took her a few moments to realise that Rodney had stopped moving and was staring down at her. "You okay?"
John just nodded, unwilling to trust herself to actually form coherent words.
Rodney smiled, "That good huh?"
Again John nodded, drawing out a small chuckle from Rodney before she was being kissed again. Only the kiss didn't last long before Rodney was pulling back and travelling down her body, gently nibbling at her very hard nipples before moving south and peppering her belly button with kisses. And it was then, and only then, that John realised what Rodney was about to do and nearly came right there from the thought of it alone.
If Rodney noticed, he didn't seem to care, instead concentrating on removing John's underwear inch by inch and driving John absolutely crazy in the process.
Rodney had sat back on hiss heels to pull her underwear the last of the way off her legs, dropping it onto the floor unceremoniously before slowly trailing his big hands all the way up John's legs, parting them as he did so. John lay back and watched every single move Rodney made, unable to take her eyes off of him as he bent forward to kiss her navel once more.
It wasn't until Rodney lowered his face and she felt the first swipe of a hot, hard tongue against her that she stopped looking as her eyes had rolled back in her head preventing her from being able to focus.
If getting head as a man had been good, then getting it as a woman was the most amazing feeling in the world. Rodney's tongue was doing the most wonderful things to her and every time he flicked it over her clit, her leg would twitch involuntarily, and no matter what she did, she couldn't stop it. Then Rodney added his hand to the mix, gently easing a finger inside and curling it so that when he moved his finger in and out it would rub off what he now knew to be where the G-spot was located. Needless to say, a second earth shattering orgasm hit her like a sledge hammer, her body curling up off the bed as she gripped onto the sheets as hard as she could.
And Rodney, the bastard, just kept on licking and fingering her as she rode it out, drawing out the pleasure for as long as was possible, only stopping when John had enough motor control to reach down and tug at his hair.
Fortunately, Rodney took the hint and began to work his way back up her body, exploring with his mouth as he went, causing sparks of pleasure to every bit of flesh he touched. John meanwhile let her head fall back onto the pillow and just took deep breaths, trying to stop the light headed feeling she'd come over with all of a sudden. It was ridiculous really, it was just a couple of orgasms, but then, they were two very powerful orgasms, very close together.
"You back with me?" Rodney asked as he kissed along her collar bone.
"Almost," John told him honestly.
Rodney raised his head and smiled down at her, his cheeks and lips red from exertion, "So it's different then? The um... orgasms?"
John nodded, "If I hadn't already made my decision, then I think this would've sealed the deal."
Rodney's smile got a little bit wider before he leaned down and kissed John again. John reached up to wrap her arms around his neck, shifting her hips a little and it was then that she felt it; Rodney's still very prominent erection.
"Rodney?" she asked as she reached between them to wrap her hand around him.
Rodney let out a small, happy sigh before shaking his head, "It's fine," he said. "We don't have to do anything until you're ready."
John quirked an eyebrow at him and gently stroked up and down, "Rodney," she began, "I am very ready."
Rodney's answering groan was enough to make John smile and roll away from Rodney, reaching down into the bottom drawer bedside his bed to the sock drawer.
Rodney didn't seem fazed by the fact that John knew where he kept his condoms, instead he lay behind John, stroking a finger up and down her waist and laying soft kisses on her shoulders. It was so intoxicating, that John almost turned right back over forgetting about condoms, however, some semblance of common sense managed to stay with her as she pulled one out and finally turned back to face Rodney.
Almost immediately he caught her in a hard and passionate kiss, wrapping his big strong arms - and John would never ever get tired of those particular attributes - around her body and rolled her to lay back down on her back again. The kissed slowly, hands going everywhere on each other, certain parts rubbing against other parts until John couldn't take it anymore and pulled back.
Rodney stared down at her, raised ever so slightly on his elbows so that John could take him in hand once again. John slowly stroked him, spreading her own moisture over him until Rodney whispered in her ear, "Now Sheppard."
Not one to waste time, John tore open the condom packet and slid the sheath down Rodney's pulsing cock. Rodney lowered his head and watched carefully, his breaths getting deeper and deeper as he tried to remain calm. Once it was on, Rodney slowly raised his head to look at John.
"You're sure?"
John's answer was to spread her legs further and pull him down for another kiss. Rodney finally took the hint and began to manoeuvre himself, gripping John's legs behind the knees to pull up and out, allowing him better access as he positioned the head of his cock at her entrance.
John felt herself stiffen a little in anticipation, but then Rodney began to nibble on her ear, whispering promises of extreme pleasure and blowing of minds, that he managed to distract her... until he actually penetrated her that is.
She knew it was supposed to be painful, that it would hurt. But OW! She hadn't expected that. Rodney seemed to have noticed that she was no longer being just as "enthusiastic" but instead of pulling out and apologising profusely like she expected him to, he kissed her, his tongue flicking over her lips in a way that John knew she would give him anything so long as he kept doing that. And then he began to rock his hips, his cock rubbing off her G-spot, causing the pain to fade and the pleasure to rise and before she was completely aware of what was happening, she was flexing her hips in tandem with Rodney's.
John had had sex with her fair share of men, but none of them, not one, had been able to unravel her the way in which Rodney McKay was. Having him inside her, moving in time with her, kissing her and holding her they way he was with so much care and affection and dare she say it, love, was all too much.
With her arms and legs wrapped around him, her face buried in the crook of his neck, breathing him in, she came so hard she almost passed out... almost. Instead she felt her walls clamping down on Rodney, groaning loudly, nails digging into his back as she clung to consciousness. And then, just as she rode out the last waves of her third orgasm in quick succession, Rodney's hips became extremely sporadic before he hissed "fuck" in her ear and stilled his movements.
Holding each other loosely, faces buried in each other's shoulders, they lay together just listening to each other's breaths before Rodney mumbled something into her skin.
"What?" John asked, having not been able to decipher what he was saying.
"I said sorry," Rodney repeated, lifting his head.
John frowned. "Um, what for?"
"For uh, you know, so quick," Rodney explained, his face flushing a deep read as he did so. "It's just been a while and you're so hot."
John laughed. "Rodney, don't be ridiculous. I never even noticed. My mind was to busy being blown."
Rodney smiled. "Well as long as you're sure?" He asked.
"I'm sure," John nodded, stroking a hand down Rodney's face as he gently rolled off of her and to the side.
They lay side by side, Rodney's hands doing that soft finger stroking thing down her skin again as they kissed lazily.
"So you're okay?" Rodney asked after a while.
"I'm a little sore, but I'll live," John assured him.
"Good," Rodney said with a smile before silence fell upon them. "So um, can I ask you something?"
"Sure."
"This uh, decision of yours. It doesn't have anything to do with me, does it?"
"You mean, did I decide to stay female so we could have sex?"
"In short, yes."
"No," John told him.
"No?"
"Sorry," John said, "but the truth is, I am actually very comfortable like this. I feel better about myself now than I have in years. It just made sense. And if the right kind of ancient tech comes along that will change me back, then so be it. But I'm not going to go through years of surgery just to become a crap copy of the man I used to be when I'm fit and healthy and happy."
"Oh. I see," Rodney said. "Makes sense I suppose."
"However," John began as she pushed up onto her elbow, "making that decision has allowed me to pursue other things that I wouldn't otherwise experience as a man."
"Like me you mean?"
"Yes, like you. And now that I've had you, there's no way I'm giving you up. So until they repeal DADT, you're going to have to put up with me as I am."
Rodney's mouth quirked up in a half smile. "Well, it'll take a lot of effort on my part, but I'm willing to give it a shot."
John grinned and leaned forward to give the only reply she could think of; a deep promise filled kiss.
THE END
Author:
ru_salki99Recipient:
icarusancalionBeta:
raging_pancakeRating: NC-17
Pairing: John/Rodney
Disclaimer: SGA belongs to MGM
Warnings: Genderswitch, transgender issues
Summary: John falls victim to an Ancient population control device and becomes, well, female.
( And The Plural For Penis Is? Part 1 of 2 )
---
Five weeks. Five weeks had passed and he was still very much female. So female in fact, he'd even had a period... and if that hadn't been the most anti-climatic experience of his life, he wasn't sure what was.
Two weeks ago, he'd gone to Keller for one of his regular check ups and had told her about how he was feeling more lethargic lately, that he had a weird achy feeling like maybe trapped wind or something and could she prescribe him something. She gave him pain killers, iron supplements, a hot water bottle and a bag of sanitary products... much to his confusion.
"Sounds like your cycle is starting," she told him. "You'll need to figure out if you prefer tampons or towels. Towels are good for night 'cause you don't need to get up and change them."
"Right," he'd said as he stared into the bag.
"You'll be fine," she said with a smile. "Use the hot water bottle. It'll help with the cramp. Hot baths help too. Oh and if you can get your hands on it, chocolate."
"Chocolate? That really works?"
"Hell yeah!" Keller said, her smile turning into a grin, as she started to dismiss him. "Let me know when you start, how heavy it is, how bad the cramping is and when it stops okay?"
"Um, sure," John said with a nod before hurrying out of the infirmary to stash his lady things in his underwear drawer.
He'd then gone in search of Rodney, for if there was one person who he knew had chocolate, it was him. He found him in the mess with Zelenka and Ronon. The three of them smiled and invited him to join them, but John waved them off, instead asking to speak with Rodney for a second.
"What is it? Is something wrong?"
"No, no. Nothing's wrong," John reassured him. "I just... I need chocolate and you're the only person I know who has some."
"You need chocolate?"
John nodded, "It's um..." he trailed off, feeling himself blushing.
And for all that he'd complained that Rodney had been doing that an awful lot with him to start with, ever since that day in the lab, John hadn't been able to stop himself from blushing in Rodney's presence. His body just liked to react to him in ways John couldn't prevent.
Thankfully however, Rodney seemed to understand almost straight away. John guessed having a sister had its benefits.
"Oh, you need it. Right, well I uh, I actually have to get down to the labs, but take out my sock drawer, it's all behind there."
"You don't mind me going into your room?" John asked him.
"Don't be ridiculous," Rodney said, resting a hand on his shoulder, "just go help yourself. Take as much as you need."
John nodded. "Okay," he said. "Thanks Rodney."
"Don't mention it," Rodney said with a shrug, "After all what else are knights in shining armour for if not to provide our damsels in distress with chocolate?"
"I own a gun," John reminded him, which for some reason only made Rodney smile as he made his way back to the others.
He'd found the chocolate no problem and had only taking a few pieces, not wanting to leave Rodney chocolateless, and he did not, under any circumstances, notice the condom box that resided in Rodney's sock drawer. Nuh uh.
He was aware that he had probably more than friendly feelings towards Rodney, the fact that his stomach did flip flops and he got wet whenever he was in the man's presence was a pretty big tell tale sign.
But he'd been attracted to him long before all of this had happened, so it wasn't anything to do with his gender, except maybe now Rodney would be interested in return... it was stupid, and wasn't really something to dwell on as he had far more important things to worry about than pretty eyed physicists and why they needed condoms.
Johnstone had more or less told him that at the moment, he had to concentrate on himself before anything else. His sessions with Johnstone had actually helped, but John wasn't about to admit that out loud to anyone; not wanting to ruin his reputation amongst his peers about being intolerant of shrinks. But he went every week, told Johnstone how he was adapting, how many times he'd cried that week, what he was feeling about himself in general.
The week of the period, Johnstone got a little excited. But John told him, he got some cramps and ate some chocolate that Rodney had given him. Johnstone had raised a curious eyebrow at that the mention of Rodney, but had refrained from commenting. He told him how when the bleeding started, he realised he preferred tampons to towels 'cause they didn't get in the way and then a few days later the bleeding stopped and that was that. No big deal.
Now, a week later--five weeks after the initial event--he was about to attend another senior staff meeting where Carson and Rodney had an announcement to make. He hadn't seen much of Rodney for the past few days and when he had seen him he'd been looking pretty exhausted so John had a small hope that perhaps they'd finally gotten some kind of breakthrough.
Morreti had already decided to start the gender therapy. John had had a meeting with him and O'Neill where they discussed Morreti's position within the military on Atlantis. He was to stay, carry on working during the initial hormone therapy and then, when he got his surgery, he would remain on Atlantis to heal before resuming his duties.
Hardy, had apparently been having gender issues for a long time but had previously been unable to get any kind of surgery because he or rather she was a haemophiliac and no surgeon on Earth would touch her before. So for the first time in her life, she was completely happy. And John was happy for her.
John meanwhile, couldn't actually decide what he wanted to do. He'd spent five weeks as a woman now and in all honestly, they weren't bad or painful and he'd actually got used to the move and feel of himself. He was training again both with Teyla and Ronon and no longer worried about getting checked out, in fact, he kind of enjoyed it sometimes.
Sure he missed the easiness of being male, the peeing standing up, being able to reach climax quickly - he'd not really explored that part of his body, but he'd certainly enjoyed it when he had... stickiness aside - and the not actually having to shower every day.
Sitting down in the board room, O'Neill - who was aiming to go back to Earth in a few days - gave him a short nod, while Rodney, who was in his usual place next to him, didn't even look at him. And that alone let John know that whatever was about to be said wasn't going to be good.
When everyone was finally seated, Carson, looking as tired as Rodney, stood up.
"So, we've finished our analysis of the lab," he said. "We found in the database an entry that explains the reasoning for one half of the couple having to activate the disk. The reasoning being that the gene in the individual going through the change would only respond to the gene of someone who they trusted and cared deeply about. Which, when the General reviewed the security feed for the lab, he confirmed for us. The three men who activated each of your disks are very close to you."
John looked at Rodney then, for he was the only gene carrier who had been in that room who he had been remotely close to or trusted, which meant that Rodney was probably on a very big guilt trip at the moment.
Morreti and Hardy were both frowning, obviously thinking of the others who had been in the room with them when they had changed.
"The process of the change is really quite a simple one. A beam comes out of the disk, encompassing the individual standing on it and the 'y' chromosome is removed, changing the man into a woman, their appearance exactly what it would be had they been born female instead of male."
"I don't get it," Morreti said.
John rolled his eyes. He knew Morreti wasn't stupid, he would have never become an officer if he was, it was probably just pure laziness that he didn't actually know anything about chromosomes or didn't want to.
"You understand the process of conception yes?" Carson asked him.
"Of course I do," Morreti said, looking annoyed.
"Well, each of us have two chromosomes in our genetic make up that determine our sex. Females, have two x chromosomes making them XX, while men have an x and a y, making us XY. The way in which our sex is determined depends on if the sperm fertalising the egg contains an x or a y chromosome as every egg is XX."
"Every egg is XX?" Morreti asked.
"Yes sergeant, that's what I said," Carson nodded. "We all start off as XX and this machine was made to revert anyone who was born XY back to their XX status."
"So we are completely, one hundred percent female?" Hardy asked.
"Yes." Carson nodded.
"Okay," O'Neill said, "so have you found a way to reverse it?"
Carson turned to Rodney. "Do you want to handle this one?"
Rodney sighed but nodded his head, "So, we examined all the data and came up with our own version that theoretically, should have been able to input the y chromosome. We even took apart one of the disks and attempted to reverse engineer it by applying our theory. However, all of our trials and simulations failed. We have no idea why."
"So what you're saying is?" John asked.
"I'm sorry John, but I can't fix this. None of us can. It's impossible."
John knew he should have felt upset at this, should've gotten angry and yelled at the injustice of it all. But looking at Rodney, seeing how utterly exhausted the man was and how devastated that he wasn't able to fix John, he just couldn't bring himself to get even a little bit annoyed.
"You tried," John said, reaching out to rub a hand along Rodney's arm in what he hoped was a soothing manner, "that's the important thing."
Rodney looked at him out of the corner of his eye, turning his arm round so that when John stroked downwards again, he was able to easily thread their fingers together. It should've felt weird, his now small hand wrapped up in Rodney's, but there was something about it that somehow made all of this, this entire nightmare, just seem better for a minute.
"Well, I guess we should then continue with your care plans as already agreed with doctors Keller, Beckett and Johnstone," Woolsey told them all. "Is there anything else?" he then asked Carson.
"No. You'll have a report of my findings on your desk in a day or two. But I'll be heading back to Earth with the General at the end of the week."
"Of course," Woolsey nodded, "in that case, you're all dismissed."
John rose with Rodney, intending to walk him back to his quarters and make the man get some sleep. However, just as they stepped out into the corridor, still holding hands, O'Neill called on John.
"Colonel, walk with me," he said, jerking his head to the right as he began to walk in the opposite direction.
John turned to Rodney, "Hey look, go get some sleep," he said, "I'll come see you when I'm done and we'll um, well."
Rodney nodded, "Yeah okay," he said, giving John's hand a soft squeeze before letting go and heading off towards the transporter.
John jogged to catch up with O'Neill who appeared to be heading towards the guest quarters where he was staying.
"Sir?" he asked once he was walking side by side with him.
"Let's do this in private," O'Neill said to him and so John didn't say anything else until the door had shut behind him and he was standing inside O'Neill's guest room.
He watched as O'Neill sat down on the bed and gestured for John to take the desk chair.
"So," he said once John was sitting down, "you and McKay?"
John felt his face go bright red. "Sir, I know what it looks like but I promise, nothing is going on and nothing has ever gone on. We're just friends and that's all we've been..."
"Sheppard, I couldn't care less," O'Neill told him. "But I have to ask because it looks to me that it won't be very long until you're a little more than friends and since you two have always been close... the SGC will want to know."
"I understand Sir," John nodded.
O'Neill stared at him for a second, studying before he spoke again, "I know that sexuality has nothing to do with gender," he begun, "but you're female now John, so if you were to end up in a relationship with a man, there would be no rules against it," he said. "You wouldn't have to hide it."
John nodded, "I'm aware of that," he said quietly.
O'Neill gave him a small nod, "Just so long as we're clear," he said.
"Crystal," John told him.
"Good. You can go now."
"Thank you Sir," John said as he stood.
"Oh one more thing colonel," O'Neill called, stopping John just before he walked through the door. "I'm leaving in three days. You'll need to let me know before then whether you require a new dress uniform or not."
Shit. John hadn't thought of that, "I'll get back to you Sir."
With one more nod from O'Neill, John all but fled the room, heading for his own quarters instead of Rodney's needing to be on his own for a while.
He ignored everyone else as he made his way there, in no mood to socialise with anyone. When he got to his room he sat down on the bed with a thump and stared down at his feet. They were smaller than they used to be, but in the military issue boots, looked more or less the same.
Standing up, he walked over to the bathroom, watching his feet the entire way. His strides were smaller yet still strong and still had the same, familiar swagger to them. When he got to the bathroom he turned to look in the mirror.
His BDU's didn't give away much about what was going on underneath them. Sure his thigh holster sat a little differently on him now that his hips were a little wider and thigh a different shape, but it wasn't overly obvious or anything.
But then he continued up and saw the way his breasts stretched his t-shirt. He had grown so used to having them, to seeing them in the mirror every morning that it felt a little weird to be examining himself like this. They were as much a part of him now as his eyes or hair.
And everything else that he knew he'd find if he took off his clothes. Those hips, the waist, the tiny hands and feet, the vagina. It was all his. All him.
He was a woman.
John let himself into Rodney's quarters, not at all surprised to find that Rodney was not in bed like he'd told him to be. His first thought was that Rodney had gone to the labs, no doubt wanting to go over the data again. But then, he heard the flush of the toilet coming from the bathroom and he realised Rodney was still there.
"Rodney?" he called.
The door opened, steam billowing out into the room, preceding Rodney's head, "I kind of smelled," he said as way of an explanation. "I haven't showered in days."
John smiled, knowing how Rodney got when he was concentrating on something, "You haven't shaved either," he pointed out, gesturing to Rodney's scruffy face.
"Yes well," Rodney adjusted the towel that was round his waist and stepped back inside the bathroom.
John followed him, leaning on the doorframe and watching as Rodney began to cover his face in shaving foam, the towel hanging low around his waist, his skin pink and glistening with the moisture still hanging in the air. John knew he was checking him out, but he really couldn't be blamed for that; Rodney's biceps... he hadn't actually noticed how large and toned they were. He had to have been working out with Ronon more than usual lately.
"You're smiling," Rodney said as he rinsed the excess foam from his hand, "why are you smiling?"
"I'm not going to change again," John told him as he stepped forward.
"You're not?"
John shook his head, "No. I mean, sure it was hard to start with but, I'm kind of used to being, well, me," he said with a shrug as he reached out and grabbed Rodney's razor.
Rodney gulped. "Really? You're happy?"
"Yeah," John nodded. "I mean, I get why Morreti isn't and why Hardy is, but for me, not much has changed in the grand scheme of things. I'm still me, I just look a little bit different."
"Well that's not strictly true," Rodney said as John sat himself up on the sink, "you're a lot prettier now than you used to be."
John smiled and grabbed Rodney's chin, tilting it up so he could start shaving him, "You trying to say I wasn't pretty McKay?"
"Not at all. I said you were prettier. You've always been somewhat pretty."
John didn't reply, just smiled to himself as he concentrated on not cutting Rodney. "Stop smiling."
"Sorry. Can't help it," Rodney told him, doing his best to school his face.
It should have felt weird, sitting here with Rodney standing between his legs as John shaved him. It was ridiculously intimate and of course, a certain heat was spreading down into his groin with the way Rodney had his hands placed on John's thighs.
"So what's the rule here?" Rodney asked as John rinsed off the razor. "What set of pronouns are we allowed to use?"
"What do you mean?" John asked curiously.
"Well, if I was to mention you to someone, should I say 'he' or 'she'?"
"Um... well I guess, feminine pronouns would be more appropriate," John said with a shrug.
"You don't think of yourself as a 'she'?"
"No. No, I do I guess. Yeah, yeah I'm a she," she said with a smile.
Rodney returned her smile before going quiet as John finished up, and soon the tension between them began to build even more. Both of them leaned into each other slightly and John was sure Rodney had a bit of a bump in the front of his towel that wasn't there ten minutes ago.
"So, what did O'Neill want?" Rodney asked quietly, his hands sliding up to rest at John's hips.
"He wanted to know if we were ever involved while I was a man," John told him, sliding her hands up Rodney's arms to rest on those biceps that she was all of a sudden rather obsessed with.
"Oh."
"Hmm," John said with a slight nod, "he also wanted to remind me, that now I'm a woman, I wouldn't have to hide it if I were to become involved with a man."
Rodney's hands tightened on her hips before they slowly began to work their way round John's back, up and under her t-shirt. It shouldn't have been such a turn on that Rodney's hand was able to cover the entire expanse of his back, but the feel of it just about turned John to putty.
"And is there a particular man you have in mind?" Rodney asked as he leaned down towards John.
"Possibly," John was just able to whisper before Rodney's lips connected with her own and she was pulled against a hard chest.
As kisses went, not only was it disgustingly hot, but it was new and different and felt so completely right that John didn't ever want it to stop. However, Rodney had other ideas and pulled back to lift John's t-shirt off, leaving John in the small black sports bra Keller had given her all those week's ago.
Rodney dropped John's t-shirt onto the floor before lifting his hand to gently caress one of John's breasts through the thick cotton and wow, Rodney's hand completely encompassed him, which for some reason turned John on even more and made his breath hitch.
"Can I..." Rodney began, reaching up to tug on one of the straps.
"Yeah," John nodded before sitting still and letting Rodney's oh so talented hands remove the confining item.
As soon as it was off, Rodney groaned softly before leaning back in to kiss John once more, his thumbs rubbing small circles on John's nipples and making John moan in a way she was sure was pretty indecent.
Then all of a sudden, Rodney clamped his hands onto John's thighs and lifted her up off the sink. John immediately wrapped her legs around Rodney's waist, holding on for dear life and marvelling at just how strong Rodney was - or maybe she was just a lot smaller than he thought he was - as he walked them through into the bedroom.
They landed on the bed with a slight 'oof', Rodney quickly apologising before they raced to get John's clothes off of her.
John lay back and let Rodney yank off her pants, leaving her in just her underwear - the small black 'boy shorts' that had arrived with the Daedalus last week - as Rodney stood at the bottom of the bed and just stared at her, his eyes completely filled with lust and something else that caused a warm flush to spread up John's cheeks. No one had ever looked at her like that before and it caused her breath to quicken and skin to tingle while she waited for Rodney to join her.
Rodney didn't waste much more time after that, hooking a thumb into the towel around his waist and pulling, causing it to fall to the floor, exposing his rock hard cock for John to see. As her eyes fell upon Rodney's considerable erection, she felt herself bite her lip, something she was aware that she did when she was nervous, and it seemed that Rodney was aware of this too. His expression quickly changed from one of insatiable hunger to one of affectionate concern. Slowly he began to crawl up John's body, laying soft, feather light kisses upon her skin as he went and John was helpless to the quiet moans that escaped her lips.
When Rodney's face was level with her own, he leaned down and placed a gentle kiss upon John's nose, cheeks and forehead before finally capturing her mouth in a deep, passionate kiss. When they pulled apart, John could hardly breath she was that aroused.
"We take this as far as you want," Rodney told her, his fingers gently carding their way through John's messy hair. "We don't have to do everything today."
"I know," was all John said before she reached up to kiss Rodney again, wrapping her legs around Rodney's waist and pulling him down onto her.
Rodney moaned into the kiss, his hand that was in John's hair coming down to cup her face, the other slowly travelling down her body to gently trail up and down her side, which was actually more of a turn on than she would ever have thought. Then Rodney began to rock his hips, his cock gently nudging against her clitoris, shooting pleasure through her body.
It was hot and so completely spine tingling that it didn't take long before John felt her body begin to shudder and her inner walls begin to tighten before she was suddenly throwing her head back and let out a deep moan as her first orgasm in her new body swept through her.
It took her a few moments to realise that Rodney had stopped moving and was staring down at her. "You okay?"
John just nodded, unwilling to trust herself to actually form coherent words.
Rodney smiled, "That good huh?"
Again John nodded, drawing out a small chuckle from Rodney before she was being kissed again. Only the kiss didn't last long before Rodney was pulling back and travelling down her body, gently nibbling at her very hard nipples before moving south and peppering her belly button with kisses. And it was then, and only then, that John realised what Rodney was about to do and nearly came right there from the thought of it alone.
If Rodney noticed, he didn't seem to care, instead concentrating on removing John's underwear inch by inch and driving John absolutely crazy in the process.
Rodney had sat back on hiss heels to pull her underwear the last of the way off her legs, dropping it onto the floor unceremoniously before slowly trailing his big hands all the way up John's legs, parting them as he did so. John lay back and watched every single move Rodney made, unable to take her eyes off of him as he bent forward to kiss her navel once more.
It wasn't until Rodney lowered his face and she felt the first swipe of a hot, hard tongue against her that she stopped looking as her eyes had rolled back in her head preventing her from being able to focus.
If getting head as a man had been good, then getting it as a woman was the most amazing feeling in the world. Rodney's tongue was doing the most wonderful things to her and every time he flicked it over her clit, her leg would twitch involuntarily, and no matter what she did, she couldn't stop it. Then Rodney added his hand to the mix, gently easing a finger inside and curling it so that when he moved his finger in and out it would rub off what he now knew to be where the G-spot was located. Needless to say, a second earth shattering orgasm hit her like a sledge hammer, her body curling up off the bed as she gripped onto the sheets as hard as she could.
And Rodney, the bastard, just kept on licking and fingering her as she rode it out, drawing out the pleasure for as long as was possible, only stopping when John had enough motor control to reach down and tug at his hair.
Fortunately, Rodney took the hint and began to work his way back up her body, exploring with his mouth as he went, causing sparks of pleasure to every bit of flesh he touched. John meanwhile let her head fall back onto the pillow and just took deep breaths, trying to stop the light headed feeling she'd come over with all of a sudden. It was ridiculous really, it was just a couple of orgasms, but then, they were two very powerful orgasms, very close together.
"You back with me?" Rodney asked as he kissed along her collar bone.
"Almost," John told him honestly.
Rodney raised his head and smiled down at her, his cheeks and lips red from exertion, "So it's different then? The um... orgasms?"
John nodded, "If I hadn't already made my decision, then I think this would've sealed the deal."
Rodney's smile got a little bit wider before he leaned down and kissed John again. John reached up to wrap her arms around his neck, shifting her hips a little and it was then that she felt it; Rodney's still very prominent erection.
"Rodney?" she asked as she reached between them to wrap her hand around him.
Rodney let out a small, happy sigh before shaking his head, "It's fine," he said. "We don't have to do anything until you're ready."
John quirked an eyebrow at him and gently stroked up and down, "Rodney," she began, "I am very ready."
Rodney's answering groan was enough to make John smile and roll away from Rodney, reaching down into the bottom drawer bedside his bed to the sock drawer.
Rodney didn't seem fazed by the fact that John knew where he kept his condoms, instead he lay behind John, stroking a finger up and down her waist and laying soft kisses on her shoulders. It was so intoxicating, that John almost turned right back over forgetting about condoms, however, some semblance of common sense managed to stay with her as she pulled one out and finally turned back to face Rodney.
Almost immediately he caught her in a hard and passionate kiss, wrapping his big strong arms - and John would never ever get tired of those particular attributes - around her body and rolled her to lay back down on her back again. The kissed slowly, hands going everywhere on each other, certain parts rubbing against other parts until John couldn't take it anymore and pulled back.
Rodney stared down at her, raised ever so slightly on his elbows so that John could take him in hand once again. John slowly stroked him, spreading her own moisture over him until Rodney whispered in her ear, "Now Sheppard."
Not one to waste time, John tore open the condom packet and slid the sheath down Rodney's pulsing cock. Rodney lowered his head and watched carefully, his breaths getting deeper and deeper as he tried to remain calm. Once it was on, Rodney slowly raised his head to look at John.
"You're sure?"
John's answer was to spread her legs further and pull him down for another kiss. Rodney finally took the hint and began to manoeuvre himself, gripping John's legs behind the knees to pull up and out, allowing him better access as he positioned the head of his cock at her entrance.
John felt herself stiffen a little in anticipation, but then Rodney began to nibble on her ear, whispering promises of extreme pleasure and blowing of minds, that he managed to distract her... until he actually penetrated her that is.
She knew it was supposed to be painful, that it would hurt. But OW! She hadn't expected that. Rodney seemed to have noticed that she was no longer being just as "enthusiastic" but instead of pulling out and apologising profusely like she expected him to, he kissed her, his tongue flicking over her lips in a way that John knew she would give him anything so long as he kept doing that. And then he began to rock his hips, his cock rubbing off her G-spot, causing the pain to fade and the pleasure to rise and before she was completely aware of what was happening, she was flexing her hips in tandem with Rodney's.
John had had sex with her fair share of men, but none of them, not one, had been able to unravel her the way in which Rodney McKay was. Having him inside her, moving in time with her, kissing her and holding her they way he was with so much care and affection and dare she say it, love, was all too much.
With her arms and legs wrapped around him, her face buried in the crook of his neck, breathing him in, she came so hard she almost passed out... almost. Instead she felt her walls clamping down on Rodney, groaning loudly, nails digging into his back as she clung to consciousness. And then, just as she rode out the last waves of her third orgasm in quick succession, Rodney's hips became extremely sporadic before he hissed "fuck" in her ear and stilled his movements.
Holding each other loosely, faces buried in each other's shoulders, they lay together just listening to each other's breaths before Rodney mumbled something into her skin.
"What?" John asked, having not been able to decipher what he was saying.
"I said sorry," Rodney repeated, lifting his head.
John frowned. "Um, what for?"
"For uh, you know, so quick," Rodney explained, his face flushing a deep read as he did so. "It's just been a while and you're so hot."
John laughed. "Rodney, don't be ridiculous. I never even noticed. My mind was to busy being blown."
Rodney smiled. "Well as long as you're sure?" He asked.
"I'm sure," John nodded, stroking a hand down Rodney's face as he gently rolled off of her and to the side.
They lay side by side, Rodney's hands doing that soft finger stroking thing down her skin again as they kissed lazily.
"So you're okay?" Rodney asked after a while.
"I'm a little sore, but I'll live," John assured him.
"Good," Rodney said with a smile before silence fell upon them. "So um, can I ask you something?"
"Sure."
"This uh, decision of yours. It doesn't have anything to do with me, does it?"
"You mean, did I decide to stay female so we could have sex?"
"In short, yes."
"No," John told him.
"No?"
"Sorry," John said, "but the truth is, I am actually very comfortable like this. I feel better about myself now than I have in years. It just made sense. And if the right kind of ancient tech comes along that will change me back, then so be it. But I'm not going to go through years of surgery just to become a crap copy of the man I used to be when I'm fit and healthy and happy."
"Oh. I see," Rodney said. "Makes sense I suppose."
"However," John began as she pushed up onto her elbow, "making that decision has allowed me to pursue other things that I wouldn't otherwise experience as a man."
"Like me you mean?"
"Yes, like you. And now that I've had you, there's no way I'm giving you up. So until they repeal DADT, you're going to have to put up with me as I am."
Rodney's mouth quirked up in a half smile. "Well, it'll take a lot of effort on my part, but I'm willing to give it a shot."
John grinned and leaned forward to give the only reply she could think of; a deep promise filled kiss.
THE END
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}