ext_75026 ([identity profile] sgasesa-admin.livejournal.com) wrote in [community profile] sga_santa2005-12-21 05:50 pm

Fic: Jingle Wings

Title: Jingle Wings
Author: [livejournal.com profile] forcryinoutloud
Rating: R
Pairing: John/Rodney
Category: Humor, Fluff, AU, Romance, Crack
For: [livejournal.com profile] wickedwords
Summary: I selflessly helped a poor struggling elf to earn his over-sized jingle shoes and found the spirit of Christmas all while getting laid.

Jingle Wings

The mall was polluted with people, all smiling their fake holiday smiles as they shoved people out of the way to get to the last pair of ugly leather gloves or horrendous holiday themed sweatshirt. He hated malls, he hated crowds, he hated Christmas; which made standing in a sea of people all hunting for last minute Christmas presents that much worse.

Glaring a hole into the throng of people Rodney began to push through intent on getting to the computer place to pick up his newly ordered computer parts and get the hell out of the mall before some demented mall employee dressed as an elf tried to convince him he needed ten pounds of rock candy to rot his teeth on.

Halfway to the store there was a human traffic jam and Rodney was forced to wait amongst people pretending to be filled with holiday cheer until someone got their ass in gear so those who had places to be could just fucking get there already. Taking a deep breath Rodney closed his eyes and counted to ten trying to calm down; when he opened them he was staring into a pair of sparkling hazel eyes.

The man in front of him had a cocky smirk and hair that looked like it was trying to hail a cab; he was tall, a little taller than Rodney; slim build but he definitely looked solid underneath his black crew neck sweater and black dress pants. He was also wearing possibly the ugliest and most blindingly bright scarf Rodney had ever seen.

He was grinning now and Rodney frowned, glancing behind him to see if maybe some tall, super model blonde was behind him. Turning back to the man Rodney noticed he had moved closer, much closer-so close Rodney could smell his cologne and feel his breath against his cheek.

Rodney's eyes widened in shock as he was grabbed by his collar and pulled flush against the man and into a bone melting kiss. He figured he should probably break the kiss, punch the guy in the face or some other equally heterosexual, macho display of disgust and outrage...but the man could kiss! Just as quickly as it started, it ended and Rodney was left, mouth agape staring at the smug stranger.

"What the..." Before Rodney could even finish his question the man pointed up and Rodney tilted his head back, eyes narrowing at the mistletoe above him. Fuming at the shrug his glare received Rodney was working himself into a good rant when the crowd began moving again and his stray kisser disappeared into the mob of frantic shoppers.

Ignoring the amused smirks of the people around him, he let himself be pushed towards his original destination deciding to put the kiss off as some freak moment of insanity on the part of the man in the ugly scarf. Rodney had more important things to be thinking about anyway.

Finally managing to get to the computer place and back out into the disgustingly fresh air Rodney put his head down and walked briskly towards his car intent on driving home, fixing his computer and doing all his Christmas shopping with the click of a few buttons. Sure he was already at the mall but there was no way he was spending anymore time here than was absolutely necessary and buying his sister a better laptop and her rug rats the latest in annoyingly loud toys online seemed so much more practical-not to mention less stressful.

His forward momentum was stopped suddenly; his path obstructed and he found himself sprawled on the sidewalk, glaring up at a hideously ugly scarf. Moving his eyes upwards he came face to face with the annoying smirk, intense eyes and untamed hair that had kissed him earlier in the mall. "Should I be worried that this is the second time you've assaulted me today?"

Accepting the offered hand, Rodney was pulled to his feet, "Only if you didn't enjoy it." He winks and Rodney is tempted to hit him on principle.

"Being knocked on my ass tends to make me cranky," Rodney snaps, dusting himself off and not looking at the infuriating grin on the man's face.

"Are you talking about this time or the first time?"

The amusement is clear in his voice and Rodney raises his head, narrowing his eyes and giving the man a speculative look. Suddenly feeling much too tired and cold to continue this conversation he sighs, shaking his head, "Both actually."

Nodding, the stranger stuck his hand out, "John Sheppard."

Rodney glanced at the hand before slipping it into his own, "Rodney McKay." Pulling back his hand Rodney turned his head, sneezing loudly before tugging his coat tighter around him, shivering in the cold winter air.

John surprises him again by wrapping the hideous scarf around Rodney's neck, tying it snuggly, letting his hands trail down Rodney's chest before letting them fall back to his side.

"What are you doing?" Rodney asks, eyebrows raised, hand curling around the warm scarf at his neck.

"You should stay warm-you'll catch pneumonia," John smiles, hands slipping into his pockets as he shrugs nonchalantly.

Rodney looks at John's jacketless body, wisps of pink tingeing his ears and nose. "Somehow I think you need this more than I do."

Shaking his head John winks again, only this time the urge to hit him doesn't surface. "You keep it," he squeezes Rodney's shoulder as he begins walking past him; "it suits you."

Turning, Rodney watches John walk away, whistling the theme to Scoobie Doo and he has the unexplainable urge to call him back-to not let him disappear into the city, never to be seen again. He fights the urge though and forces himself to walk back to his car; he has things that need to be done and thinking about John Sheppard is not one of them.

Finally getting his computer back together Rodney sat down to begin his Christmas tradition of online shopping. After having spent an overwhelming amount of money there was a knock at his door and he walked over, peering through the peephole to see who it was. All he could see was the horrifically ugly wreath his next door neighbor Mrs. Kelly had hung. Opening his apartment door he found John Sheppard leaning against the wall just out of sight of the peep hole.

"What are you doing here? Did you follow me?"

Reaching into his pocket John grinned, "You dropped your wallet when we bumped into each other at the mall. I figured I would be a Good Samaritan and return it to you."

"Oh, well-thank you," Rodney nodded, taking the wallet from John's hand and tossing it on the table beside the door.

"You're not going to check and see if I robbed you?" John was smirking again.

Rodney snorted, "Why, do you make a habit of robbing people and then returning their empty wallets? And here I thought you were smarter than your hair would imply."

"Why thank you, Rodney," John drawled.

"Oh! Your scarf-wait here." Before John could tell Rodney that he didn't need the scarf back he was gone. John stepped into the apartment, closing the door behind him and letting his eyes roam around the room.

Rodney came back, handing John his scarf, "Thanks again..."

"You don't celebrate Christmas?" John interrupted.

"What?"

"No Christmas tree," John waved his hand around the room pointing out the decided lack of decorations.

"Oh-well I have more important things to do than pollute my house, and my senses with garish decorations for a holiday I only marginally take part in and by that I mean the commercial aspect of it. My sister would kill me if I didn't send my namesake and his sister something every year and in retribution I make sure they are the loudest, most obnoxious toys I can possibly find."

"So that would be a no," John laughed, wrapping the scarf loosely around his neck. Rodney scowled but John just opened the door grinning broadly, "So long, Rodney-Merry Christmas!"

Just like that John Sheppard once again walked away from Rodney-only this time Rodney actually took a step forward, drawing in a breath to call him back before his phone ringing stopped him from making a fool of himself. Who in their right mind invited a total stranger in for coffee?

After listening to Jeannie yelling for ten minutes on what a horrible brother he was for sending her spawn toys designed to make her lose her mind last year and how he better not do the same this year, Rodney hung up and turned on the coffee pot, watching it drip and not at all thinking about John Sheppard.

When there was a knock on his door, he thought for one brief second that maybe it was Sheppard but shook it off as he stalked towards the incessant knocking. Rodney yanked the door open, "What?!"

There in front of him stood a sickly looking Christmas tree. Rodney didn't move, just stared at the tree until a voice made him jump. "Everyone should have a Christmas tree."

John Sheppard stepped into Rodney's line of sight, arms laden with bags of, "Are those Christmas tree decorations?" Rodney looked bewildered at John's wide grin and head bob, "Seriously, are you insane?"

John just grinned wider, shoving the bags into Rodney's hands, "Here, take these-I'll get the tree." He pushed Rodney back into his apartment, quickly following with the refugee from the forest that time forgot.

"Hey!" Rodney shouted, dropping the bags on the couch, "Your tree is shedding all over my floor!"

"That's what brooms are for, Rodney," John answered patiently. "Will you grab the tree stand for me? I think it's in the red bag."

Rodney gaped for a moment before huffing as he reached for the red bag, "I seem to remember telling you that I only partook in the commercial aspect of Christmas."

"Well-I did pay for the tree and decorations," John winked.

"Yes about that-why?"

John shrugged, "You looked like you could use a little holiday cheer."

"You do realize we're strangers, right?" Rodney asked, handing John the tree stand and standing back.

Laughing John said, "You know my name-I like football, Ferris Wheels and anything that goes over 200 miles per hour."

"Oh well, now we're bestest friends-do you want me to do your nails?" Rodney sneered, rolling his eyes at the same time and making John laugh again.

"Maybe later-wanna give me a hand here?"

"What, are you crazy? I have a bad back!" Rodney scowled, crossing his arms. "Besides, this," he waved his hand towards the tree and decorations, "is all your idea, not mine."

"Aw c'mon, Rodney," John pouted.

Rodney definitely did not give in, except, "Fine but if I end up with permanent back injury it will be your fault."

"Duly noted," John beamed. "You hold the tree and I'll get it in the tree stand."

After much grunting and swearing on Rodney's part the tree was finally standing, if a bit crookedly. "There," John breathed when he climbed out from under the tree, "perfect!"

"Yes, perfect-my leaning Christmas tree of..."

"I don't know, I think the tilt gives it charm."

"Charm-right up until all the decorations on the left side fall off."

John shook his head, "We don't have to decorate that side."

Pinching the bridge of his nose Rodney sighed, "We don't have to-really you're insane right? You can tell me, I won't turn you in-promise."

John clapped Rodney on the shoulder, turning him towards the decorations, "Now comes the fun part."

"I need coffee," Rodney grumbled.

"I got something even better," John bounced, digging into one of the bags and producing, "Hot chocolate!"

"Insane and five years old, wonderful," Rodney muttered.

"You make the hot chocolate and I'll start the decorating."

"Fine," Rodney grabbed the hot chocolate and shuffled towards the kitchen suddenly feeling really tired. "Only I could manage to find a crazed, wild haired, spirit of Christmas present wannabe and let him run over me with a Christmas tree, decorations and hot chocolate."

Rodney walked back into the living room with the hot chocolate to find the tree twinkling in lights, a star adorning the top and John placing small molecule shaped ornaments on strategic branches, "It--wow!" Rodney was speechless--the tree actually looked, "It's beautiful." He had no idea how John had managed to not only make his sad, sickly looking Christmas tree look like it should be in a store display but he also had no idea how John had managed to do it so fast.

"Thank you," John smiled, glancing at Rodney through half lidded eyes.

"Uh, hot chocolate is ready," Rodney said as he held out a mug to John.

John wrapped his hand around the mug, his fingers brushing against Rodney's. They sat on the couch, facing the tree and sipping their hot chocolate. "Where did you get the ornaments? I've never seen molecule shaped ones before."

John held the mug to his lips, smiling, "I know a guy."

Rodney nods, "Of course you do."

"So, Rodney--"

"I like hockey, hate football, hate Ferris Wheels and anything that goes 200 miles an hour will do so without me anywhere near it," Rodney interrupted, "Oh also--Canadian, one sister and a genius--obviously."

John sat staring at Rodney, mouth open before promptly snapping it shut. "Okay," John drawled with a smirk. "I was actually going to ask you why you didn't like Christmas."

Rodney blushed, "Oh. Well isn't it obvious?"

"Not really--what's not to like about getting presents and spending time with people you love?" John shrugged.

"That would be assuming I get presents and have people to spend the holidays with."

"What about your sister?"

Rodney scoffed, "The last time I spent Christmas with her she got me an ugly tie, cologne I was allergic to and tried to set me up with one of her co-workers."

John grinned, "I take it she wasn't a looker?"

"HE was attractive enough but honestly I can only handle so much stupidity before I snap..."

"How long?" John laughed.

Rodney took a gulp of his cooling hot chocolate, waving a hand dismissively, "By the time our meal was ready Jeannie was handing him his coat. She glared at me the rest of the day," Rodney smirked. "Thankfully she hasn't attempted the role of match maker again."

John just grinned, a twinkle in his eye that had Rodney's heart speeding up, "We should finish decorating the tree."

Rodney turned back to the tree, "It looks pretty finished to me."

John laughed, reaching over and taking Rodney's mug from his hands, "Not quite." He pulled Rodney to his feet and handed him a box of ornaments made of pewter.

"They look like..."

"Constellations," John smiled as he reached into the box. "Specially made-just for you," he winked.

Rodney blushed again, undeniably touched, "Why exactly are you doing this?"

John reached back into the box, not looking Rodney in the eye as he said quietly, a small smile on his lips, "I have my reasons."

Rodney raised an eyebrow, taking in the artfully tousled hair, the twinkling eyes, the pointy ears...He went over the days events, the little oddities surrounding John Sheppard and came up with an absolutely ridiculous conclusion. One so ridiculous there was no point even mentioning it, "Oh my god-you're an elf!"

John's hand hovered above a branch as he turned slowly towards Rodney, "I'm a what now?"

"I've seen the movies-this is...oh my god, you're using me as your last chance to get your wings, aren't you?!" Rodney shouted, sliding the box of ornaments onto the coffee table so he could point at John.

"Elves don't have wings, Rodney," John drawled slowly, as if he were talking to a child, his mouth quirking into a half smile.

Rodney flailed his arms as if he were trying to bat away a swarm of flies, "That's entirely beside the point!"

"Rodney..."

"No, no-it makes perfect sense-okay well not perfect sense, but still! The kiss, the showing up on my doorstep, the tree, the decorations, the hot chocolate, the whole spirit of Christmas present vibe you have going on." Rodney paced in front of John, pointing to the tree, and the box of decorations and the empty mugs as he ranted, "This is someone's sick idea of a joke right? I'm not going to suddenly see the error of my ways and start spouting 'God bless us everyone' so you can just forget this little mission or whatever it is you're on cause it's not going to work!"

John placed a hand on Rodney's shoulder, "You can take your hot chocolate and your tree and your oddly mesmerizing decorations and..." John pulled Rodney into a kiss, quickly silencing him. When he pulled back Rodney's eyes were glazed, his lips parted, "What are you doing?" John grinned as he pointed up. Rodney's gazed followed John's pointing finger and found John holding a sprig of mistletoe above his head. "Where-how..." Rodney stopped trying to ask questions as John pulled him close once more.

Sighing, Rodney closed his eyes when John pulled away a second time, "Fine-I'll help you get your wings or your jingle hat or whatever it is elves get-but I draw the line at actually leaving my apartment so don't even think about trying to get me to spread the Christmas spirit."

"I wouldn't dream of it," John grinned. They finished decorating the tree and Rodney threw on some TV dinners while John put on some cheesy Christmas music and they ate in front of the sparkling tree, side by side, shoulder to thigh.

"So what exactly do I have to do?" Rodney asked around a mouthful of potatoes.

John raised his eyebrows, "Do?"

Rodney waved his fork around, "You know-to help you get your wings or whatever."

John's mouth twitched before he schooled his expression to somewhat serious, "You don't have to do anything you don't want to, Rodney."

Rodney nodded, a look of contemplation on his face, "Right, that's good-uh do you," he paused, "do you have to contact anyone?"

John smiled, patting Rodney's knee, "My boss is pretty lenient."

Rodney relaxed back into the couch, turning to the tree again, "It really did turn out well."

"Yeah it did," John beamed proudly, shifting so that he was leaning against Rodney.

"So," Rodney began, fidgeting slightly, "we should probably..."

"Relax, Rodney-we've got time." John laid his hand on Rodney's thigh, squeezing gently.

"About that-do you have like a-a deadline or something?" Rodney's leg felt hot where John's hand was resting, his heart racing, his palms starting to get a little clammy.

John made a show of checking his watch, "Still lots of time-don't worry about it, seriously just relax." He leaned in, pressing himself up against Rodney, his lips grazing Rodney's earlobe causing him to shiver.

"That's going to be a little hard to do with you," Rodney gestured with his hand, shifting a little on the couch, "uh-here."

John grinned and pulled back, "Okay-how bout we have some more hot chocolate?"

"Coffee?" Rodney looked hopeful.

Shaking his head John started towards the kitchen, "Hot chocolate it is!"

Rodney took the few minutes John was gone to try and relax-so he was helping an elf get his merit badge, it wasn't a big deal. He was hot and funny and smart and hot. Besides, it wasn't like Rodney was exactly inexperienced-he'd had plenty of relationships, granted they never lasted very long but that was simply a result of his partners never being up to his standards. He couldn't help it if being a genius meant that he expected a little more out of the people he was sleeping with-unless they were blonde and then he didn't really care.

John came back in with two steaming mugs of hot chocolate with tiny marshmallows that Rodney knew he didn't own with a cinnamon stick-which he also didn't own-sticking out of each mug. He handed Rodney his and took a seat on the opposite end of the couch, facing Rodney. "So, what do you like to do for fun, Rodney?"

"Uh," Rodney swirled the cinnamon stick around, taking a sip, "wow this is-delicious."

"Thank you."

"No seriously, is this like some kind of elf secret hot chocolate recipe? Cause you could make a fortune off this!" Rodney took another mouthful, ignoring the burning of his tongue as he continued babbling.

"Rodney..."

"I don't just have sex with anyone you know," he blurted out, frowning when John started to chuckle.

"It's okay Rodney-we don't have to have sex if you don't want to," John smiled easily setting Rodney's teeth on edge.

"Oh so you can blame me when you get kicked out of the elf club? I don't think so-we are totally having sex!" Rodney pointed a demanding finger towards John, narrowing his eyes and daring John to argue.

John grinned as he nodded, "You think we need to have sex for me to get my wings?"

"What? No-don't be ridiculous," Rodney answered quickly, averting his eyes, "You're here to bring me the Christmas spirit."

John curled his legs into what looked to Rodney a painful position, both hands wrapped around his mug, "What would bring you the Christmas spirit, Rodney?"

Rodney stared at the shrinking marshmallows dejectedly, "There's no such thing."

John nodded sadly, "So...how do I bring you the spirit of Christmas if you don't believe it exists?"

Rodney huffed, "You're the elf-isn't it your job to figure that out?"

John laughed, shaking his head, "You're right." He placed his mug on the table and clasped his hands together, "How about we take a walk?"

Rodney scowled, "We agreed there would be no leaving the apartment."

"A walk can't hurt," John grinned, his eyes twinkling again and Rodney felt a tingle throughout his whole body.

"You're using your elf powers on me, aren't you!?" he demanded as he stood and stalked towards his closet. "If I catch pneumonia..."

"It will be all my fault," John nodded as he bounced up from the couch walking to Rodney's side and wrapping his ugly scarf around Rodney's neck.

Rodney looked down at the scarf, at John's hands where they wrapped it snuggly around his neck, "This is a really ugly scarf."

"But it's warm," John winked.

Rodney flushed and pushed John towards the door, grabbing another jacket from the closet as they left, "Seriously, you're going to end up with frostbite." He paused at the door looking critically at John, "You should have a hat-you don't want everyone to know you're an elf."

John snagged Rodney's arm with an eye roll, pulling him out into the hallway. "I'm used to the cold-and don't worry I'll blend in," he said cheekily as he dragged Rodney towards the door.

Rodney let himself be pulled along, only grumbling a little, as the spot where John's fingers were wrapped around his arm was distracting him from actually being annoyed. He thrust the extra jacket towards John, "Humor me-I don't want to be held responsible when you return to your boss without your elf ears."

John sighed but put on the jacket, grinning when Rodney gave him a quick once over before he nodded in satisfaction. "Do I meet your approval?"

They walked in silence broken occasionally by Rodney's grumblings about the cold, John laughing as he asked, "I thought you were Canadian?"

"Despite what your US weather channels say, Canada is not actually suffering through an endless ice age. Not all of us are used to, nor do we all like the cold."

John grabbed Rodney's hand, pulling him towards the open skating rink to watch the people; families-parents, kids, friends and lovers all enjoying each other's company as they laughed and skated circles around one another. The trees around the edge of the outdoor rink were adorned with Christmas lights, sparkling brightly against the night sky. John pulled Rodney towards an empty park bench where they huddled together, watching the people gliding by.

Rodney had to admit, even if it was just to himself, that he was glad John had forced him to come outside, to enjoy the crisp winter air, the lights and the laughter. He didn't let himself enjoy much outside of work and though it had never bothered him before, tonight he wished he'd spent a little more time enjoying the simpler things in life-like the comfort a friendly face and kind heart could bring. Glancing over at John he watched as his eyes lit up with each loud whoop of laughter from the ice, as each new couple skated by, hands entwined. "Do you skate?" he asked suddenly.

John turned, smiling bashfully, "Not very well."

Rodney nodded, it wasn't surprising-John looked more like a surfer than a skater. Still he grabbed John's wrist, standing, "Let's go-I'll teach you."

John hobbled on the skates, Rodney bracing him so he didn't fall as he pulled him along, circling the rink. "You're doing great," Rodney laughed as one of John's arms flailed before latching onto him.

"Oh yeah, I'm a natural," John rolled his eyes but was still smiling.

An hour later John was gliding along beside Rodney, no longer needing the steadying hand, "You're a quick study." Rodney frowned a little as he watched John skate backwards, urging Rodney to speed up. "You're sure you've never skated before?"

John shrugged before grabbing Rodney's wrist, "Not much-you're just a really good teacher," he winked.

They walked back to Rodney's apartment in the snow, John tilting his face up to catch the snowflakes on his tongue while Rodney looked at him incredulously. Seeing the look on Rodney's face John laughed, "You should try it-tastes great."

"It's frozen water."

"Ah, but it's fresh from the sky; that makes it taste better than chocolate."

Rodney nodded like he agreed before snorting, "Nothing tastes better than chocolate except maybe coffee."

"Oh I don't know," John bounced a little beside Rodney as they neared the apartment building, "I can think of a few things that taste better." Rodney just shook his head with a smile, stopping outside his apartment building. "Thanks," John said, sticking his hands in his pockets, "I had fun tonight."

"Me too," Rodney nodded.

"Well I better," John pointed over his shoulder.

"Your scarf!" Rodney blurted, reaching for the eye sore around his neck.

"Keep it," John said, placing a hand over Rodney's before pulling the scarf a little snugger around Rodney's neck.

"Uh-thanks."

"You're welcome," John winked before taking a step back. "I should let you go inside-it's getting pretty cold out."

Rodney nodded again, watching John turn around and head down the street before shouting, "Do you want to come up for some coffee?" surprising both himself and John.

John beamed, taking the few steps back to Rodney's side, "I'd love to."

He let John into his apartment, hanging up their coats, "Coffee?"

"Sure," John smiled, his eyes focused on Rodney's mouth, "Coffee sounds great."

Rodney unconsciously licked his lips, his heart racing as he looked at John. When their eyes met Rodney figured he could have coffee in the morning. John stepped forward, hand sliding around to cup the back of Rodney's head as he leaned in to capture Rodney's mouth in a hungry kiss. Rodney's arms wrapped around John pulling him closer, hands snaking under John's shirt and across overheated flesh. "Oh god we need to be naked right now," Rodney murmured into John's mouth even as he began tugging at the hem of John's shirt, urging his arms up.

John walked Rodney backwards, towards the bedroom, hands pulling at Rodney's belt, at the button and zipper on his pants, at the buttons on Rodney's shirt. Rodney was gasping and arching into John's touch by the time they made it to the bedroom where John pushed him onto the bed, pulling his pants and boxers and socks off in quick succession, his own swiftly following until they were both naked and hard.

"Don't you-I mean," Rodney moaned as John straddled him, "don't you have to go out, you know," he waved his hand, "there tonight?"

"Rodney," John hummed into Rodney's chest, "shut up."

"Okay," Rodney panted as he buried his fingers in John's hair. When John's mouth descended on Rodney's cock he arched off the bed with a sharp intake of breath, "Fuck-who knew-elves were so-talented?"

___

Rodney stumbled from his bedroom, boxers slipping low on his hips, shirt hidden under the pile of his and John's clothes on his bedroom floor; he reached the phone on the fifth ring barking, "What?"

"Merry Christmas to you too, Rodney," Jeannie huffed.

"Jeannie?"

"Who else would be calling you to wish you a Merry Christmas?" She snapped. "I cannot believe you bought Kelly and Rodney those-those..."

"They're called toys, Jeannie," Rodney muttered into the phone, rubbing a hand over his eyes.

"I knew you always hated me," she growled.

"Well at least I got you and your rug rats something for Christmas which is more than I can say of you!" Rodney shouted into the phone, shuffling into the kitchen to make some coffee.

"What are you talking about? Didn't John get there?"

"What?" Rodney stopped mid-step. "John?" he squeaked.

"Dammit I paid extra to make sure he got there in time for Christmas!"

"Oh my god, you bought me a gigolo?!" Rodney screamed, grabbing the counter for support.

"What?!" Jeannie's voice matched Rodney's for shrillness, "I did no such-oh my god! Did you sleep with my decorator!?"

By this point Rodney was slumped in a kitchen chair and John was walking into the kitchen with a spring in his step, grinning brightly at Rodney and heading for the coffee pot. Rodney narrowed his eyes, taking the phone from his ear and pointing at John's back as he hissed, "You are not an elf!"

John turned slowly, raised eyebrow in place, smirk tugging at his lips, "I never said I was, Rodney."

"You never said you weren't! You're a-a..."

"Decorator," John nodded, still smirking as he raised his coffee mug to his lips.

Rodney glared at the phone where he could hear Jeannie's high pitched shouting, "I have to go-Merry Christmas!" He hung up and stood, stalking towards John, "You let me think you were an elf! You let me think you were here to give me the Christmas spirit, to get your jingle shoes!"

"I thought I was getting wings," John replied innocently.

"You don't deserve wings!" Rodney shouted as he poked John in the chest.

"That's not what you said last night," John shrugged, enjoying the flush in Rodney's cheeks and the way his mouth turned down on one side.

Rodney huffed, grabbing John's coffee and downing it in three gulps. "It's much too early for this conversation."

Rodney stumbled back to bed, flopped down on his stomach and closed his eyes. John followed, climbing up the bed and curling against Rodney's side, "You didn't really think I was an elf."

Rodney didn't move; his answer muffled into the pillow, "Of course I didn't-it just would have made a much more interesting story after I woke up to find you gone in the morning. I selflessly helped a poor struggling elf to earn his over-sized jingle shoes and found the spirit of Christmas all while getting laid."

John snorted into Rodney's shoulder, "You're too kind."

"Which, by the way, begs the question-why are you still here?" Rodney flipped onto his back, barely dislodging John before he settled once again along Rodney's side.

"I didn't realize you wanted me to be gone when you woke up," John all but pouted, his hand skimming along Rodney's chest making him shiver.

"I don't-didn't..." Rodney's hand curled around John's back, fingers making tiny circles as he closed his eyes and sighed, "I'm glad you're still here."

John smiled, throwing a leg over Rodney's and shifting to press a kiss to Rodney's mouth, "So did you find the Christmas spirit?"

Rodney wrapped his arms around John, rolling them so he had John pinned to the mattress as he kissed down his throat, across his collar bone murmuring, "I think I found something better."

As he arched up into Rodney's touch John grinned, "God bless us everyone."

The End

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