Oh, God, how I love Rodney realizing too late what's just come out of his mouth:

"'That you want us to live together, and then I'll try to bring someone home but instead she'll get weirded out and leave I'll be . . . frustrated, and it'll end just like it did in grad school, with me and my roommate helping each oth-- oh,' Rodney stopped, eyes bugging out."

Also: love the romantic shoe-vomiting and air-freshener threatening and general dorky inarticulateness. What great dialogue you write!